Pausing to Assess
Wednesday, June 10, 2026
A little more than two years ago, I spent some time contemplating a personal rule of life. I landed on: I long to live a just, faithful, generous, simple life in community.
A lot has changed since then and there’s value in pausing to assess whether these are still the values I hold most dear… and whether I’m living into them. I’ve found that even when my values aren’t shifting, my life is. Is my life offering an invitation to lean more heavily into one aspect of my rule than another?
A Just Life
For me, a just life is one where I live intentionally in the way I steward my resources and use my privilege. This means asking myself questions about how I’m shopping, what I’m eating and whether I turn more frequently to consumables or reusables. When we renovated our house, we put our money into creating more space for hosting. That meant leaving the kitchen as-is. For the first time in my life, I don’t have a dishwasher. I’ll admit it’s tempting at times to use paper plates for a group gathering to spare myself time at the sink later. But by and large, I have held onto my value of living justly even when that means washing up again and again.
Another part of a just life for me is voting in a way that I think will make the world a more just place. As I prepare to vote, I’m not looking for which candidate will make my own life easier, but for the one who will ensure all voices are heard. As a middle-class white woman, the world is mostly set up for my ease. Living justly means voting for that to be true no matter class, race or gender.
What does a just life look like for you?
A Faithful Life
I long to be faithful to God and to who God made me to be. There are seasons when I connect with God through resources like Sacred Space, Pray as You Go or SSJE. And there are times when I use less structured methods like breath prayer, meditation and nature. There’s a temptation to see myself as lax during a less structured season, but the truth is we need rest. I love that our church switches from two services with a formation hour to one service only during the summer months. It models that we all need a mix of leaning in and receiving with open hands.
Right now, being faithful to who God made me to be entails a lot of waiting. Waiting and watching to see what is next. Waiting for an opportunity that utilizes my administrative as well as spiritual gifts. Waiting for the next right step. There have been times in this season when I’ve longed to just make a decision and put an end to the waiting. But I trust that God will reveal His plans to be in due time, so I try to wait faithfully.
What does a faithful life look like to you?
A Generous Life
Perhaps when you think of generosity, you think of how much money you give — that is surely one way we can be generous, but no one gets into spiritual direction for the income. I’ve learned to notice not just where I give my money, but my time and talent as well. It has taken me a long time to learn that a key part of living a generous life is saying NO. If I say yes to unimportant things that aren’t really mine to do, I won’t have the energy to say yes to the actually important things. Saying no at the right time requires giving myself space to discern whether a yes or no is the right answer for me.
How do you share your time, talent and treasure? What are the ways saying no to some things has opened up space to live with true generosity?
A Simple Life
When I pause to assess my actual life compared to my rule of life, I think the hardest part to live consistently is simplicity. The world around me constantly invites complexity. Am I multi-tasking? How much can I pack into each day, hour, minute? Am I reading enough? Working enough? Cooking enough? Doing enough?
There are lots of ways to choose simplicity. Maybe you have a capsule wardrobe to minimize waste and decision making in your clothing choices. Maybe you have strict boundaries around screen time and doomscrolling. When I think of a simple life, the most concrete thing I want is margin. I want space in my calendar and enough energy in my body to respond to invitations that come my way. I want to be present with people when I’m with them, not preoccupied about what’s next.
Is there a place in your life where you long for simplicity? What does simplicity look like and feel like for you?
Life in Community
I believe humans weren’t meant to live alone. We are wired to do life together in community. Community lets us share what we have and receive what we need. When I crafted my rule in 2024, we were hosting weekly Taco Tuesdays with a mix of ages, family systems and generations. We haven’t successfully replicated Taco Tuesdays in our new home. Currently, our regular community is comprised of a small group from our church along with regular visits from our adult daughters who are in Nashville. One of our daughters hopes to move to Chicago soon, so I’m interested to see what my husband and I long for in terms of community after that shift takes place.
Where do you find community and build community?
Book Corner:
What I’ve Been Reading Lately
via library loan:
The Book of Doors by Gareth Brown
I liked this twisty-turny time travel, magic book story. Time travel is always mind-bending and this was no exception. I enjoyed the characters and that the plot never quite went where I expected.
This Book Made Me Think of You by Libby Page
What a delightful book this is for anyone who loves books and knows anything about grief. Tilly, Alfie and crew are fun to spend time with, even if the premise of the book makes it sound heavier than it is (Tilly’s husband buys her a book per month for the first year following his death). This book would make a great beach read and will remind you why you love having books in your life.
Kindness and Wonder: Why Mr. Rogers Matters Now More than Ever by Gavin Edwards
My daughter read this and then lent it to me before it goes back to the library. I didn't grow up watching Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood because we didn't get PBS where I lived. But his gentle way appealed to me when I was raising our daughters and I learned a bit more about him on a recent trip to the Heinz Museum in Pittsburgh. I will note that I found the story of Rogers interesting, but found the writing in this book to be mediocre at best.
What do you use to measure whether you’re living your life the way you long to live? May you have space and grace this week to pause and assess.
Love,
Shannon
I love the intentionality behind how you live out your faith and make decisions friend. Thanks for the peek into how this looks in day to day life.
I happen to have The Book of Doors ready to pick up from the library so I'm glad you gave it a good review!
I recognize that votive stand!